People aren’t perfect, we’re largely creatures of habit and can often wind up developing some pretty poor ones along the way. Whether something as innocuous as nail-biting, or more sinister habits that often end up manifesting into addiction, bad habits are important for us to break or at least manage so that we can better grow as individuals.
Habits in relationships are no different, from first date faux pas to harboring toxic traits that can make us bad partners, there are all kinds of awful habits you can develop in your romantic life. This week the team at Luurve breaks down 4 bad dating habits that you need to break immediately.
Living A Lie
One of the simplest yet potentially most harmful traits you can develop while dating is projecting a false image of yourself to your potential partner. While it’s understandable that nerves may be high and you want to make the best impression that you can, lying is the worst way to begin a relationship and will only serve to your detriment when the lie finally comes to light.
Honesty is usually always the best policy, you’re far better off being upfront with who you are instead of trying to impress them with falsehoods and half-truths to try to pretend you’re more compatible than you actually are. As cliche as it sounds, just be yourself and the rest will follow. Whatever will be, will be.
Not Being Present
This is a bad trait of people dating and simply people in general. There’s nothing worse than trying to share a moment with someone, only for it to quickly become painfully apparent that they’re not fully there and up off in their head somewhere. Nothing sours a date quicker than having someone constantly checking their phone, looking around aimlessly, or being able to tell their mind is wandering as you’re talking
Be in the moment. I understand that it’s often far easier said than done to stay present and not go off into your own head, but your date can always tell when your mind is clearly wandering and not giving them the basic attention they deserve.
Having A Type
As covered in our article “3 Tips For Dating Outside of Your Comfort Zone”, strict adherence to a preconceived type tends to be a huge detriment to your dating life more often than not. While we all like to fantasize about our life in a perfect ideal form with the perfect ideal partner, the reality of life is that it isn’t perfect and don’t need to be either.
We’re not advocating casting aside basic standards and preferences when it comes to choosing a potential partner. We’re just pointing out that if you tend to date the same kinds of people over and over again, and keep repeating the same mistakes with the relationships all arriving at similar outcomes, maybe it’s time to take stock of exactly where you may be going wrong and what hangups you may have.
Ignoring Red Flags
This piece of advice can not be understated, do not put off and minimize obvious red flags and incompatibilities with a prospective partner solely based on the hope of potential or clinging to the few good moments the two of you have shared together. As we’ve covered in our article “4 Red Flags You Shouldn’t Overlook In A New Relationship”, ignoring toxic elements in your present is only going to serve to your detriment in the future.
If they’re not respectful of your boundaries, rushing things, excessively insecure, or have traits of narcissism, it’s important for you to take a step back and reassess that relationship and partner. Be mindful of key compatibility differences, such as not wanting to get married or have children, as this will always lead to complete devastation down the road if not confronted directly ahead of time.
Don’t set yourself up to potentially waste years of your life on a situation that could have been avoided if you were only willing to be honest with yourself and not ignore what may otherwise have been obvious.
It’s important for us to break habits that may be toxic to us so that we can better and improve. Sometimes that requires some deep introspection and hard reflection to figure out exactly what kinds of mistakes we make and why we make them. Even though it may be difficult at times, it’s important for us to always be honest with ourselves and about our own situations so that we can grow as individuals.
Do you know of any bad dating habits we may have forgotten to mention? Have you ever been too caught up in infatuation and missed or ignored what should have been some obvious ones? We would love to hear from you, feel free to answer any and all of these questions in the comments below and let us know what you think of our advice!
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